The verses of “Touch My Body” sound like cartoon baby babble.  I could not stop laughing.

Please raise your BIG TOE and repeat after me: As a member of the Faux Paux Sisterhood, I pledge to follow The Rules when I wear sandals and other open-toe shoes:

I promise to always wear sandals that fit. My toes will not hang over and touch the ground, nor will my heels spill over the backs. And the sides and tops of my feet will not pudge out between the straps.

I will go polish-free or vow to keep the polish fresh, intact and chip-free. I will not cheat and just touch up my big toe.

I will sand down any mounds of skin before they turn hard and yellow.

I will shave the hairs off my big toe.

I won’t wear pantyhose even if my misinformed girlfriend, coworker, mother, sister tells me the toe seam really will stay under my toes if I tuck it there.

If a strap breaks, I won’t duct-tape, pin, glue or tuck it back in to place hoping it will stay put. I will get my shoe fixed or toss it.  No matter how much it hurts.

I will not live in corn denial; rather I will lean on my good friend Dr. Scholl’s if my feet need him.

I will resist the urge to buy jelly shoes at Payless for the low, low price of$4.99 even if my feet are small enough to fit into the kids’ sizes. This is out of concern for my safety, and the safety of others.  No one can walk properly when standing in a pool of sweat, and I would hate to take someone down with me as I fall and break my ankle.

I will take my toe ring off toward the end of the day if my toes swell and begin to look like Vienna sausages.

I will be brutally honest with my girlfriend/sister/coworker when she asks me if her feet are too ugly to wear sandals. Someone has to tell her that her toes look like they’ve been dragged behind her car on the way to work and no sandal in the world is going to make her feet look good.

I will promise if I wear flip flops, that I will ensure they actually flip and flop, making the correct noise while walking and I will swear NOT to slide or drag my feet while wearing them.

I will promise to go to my local beauty school at least once per season and have a real pedicure (they are about $15 and worth EVERY penny). I say spend another$15.00 and get a even better one.

And finally… I will promise to throw away any white/off-white sandals that show signs of wear…nothing is tackier than dirty white sandals…

A man in central Ohio is accused of having sex with his picnic table.

The investigation began when a tipster gave police three DVDs showing Arthur Price having sexual intercourse with a metal round table on his deck.

The incidents occurred between January and March 2008.

Police say the DVDs show Price involved in a sex act in his bedroom. He walks out to his deck, tilts the table on its side and has sex with it.

Police say Price lives near an elementary school.

Price admitted that he had sex with the picnic table when police questioned him.

He confirmed to police the incidents caught on the DVDs and said he had also had sex with the table inside the home.

Price faces four counts of public indecency. He is free on a $20,000 bond.

Source 

TV just got better.

1.  He can’t rap.

2. He wears fur.

3.  Because of him, Rell’s (my baby daddy #1) album was pushed back.

4.  He can’t rap.

5. He took the phrase “stop snitchin” and twisted its meaning.

6. He has a laffy taffy jeep.

7.  He tried to turn p*ssy pink into a fashion trend.

8. He’s associated with Jim Jones.

9.  He looks like he can suck a mean dick.

10.  He coined the phrase “no homo” which is the gayest thing I’ve ever heard (no disrespect to the gay community).

Most people feel badly about themselves from time to time. Temporary feelings of low self-esteem may be triggered by being treated poorly by someone else recently or in the past, or by a person’s own judgments of him or herself. This response is normal. However, low self-esteem is a constant companion for too many people, especially those who experience depression. If you go through life feeling bad about yourself needlessly, low self-esteem keeps you from enjoying life, doing the things you want to do, and working toward personal goals.
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Listening to music can reduce chronic pain by up to 21 per cent and depression by up to 25 per cent, according to a paper in the latest UK-based Journal of Advanced Nursing.
It can also make people feel more in control of their pain and less disabled by their condition.

Researchers carried out a controlled clinical trial with sixty people, dividing them into two music groups and a control group.

They found that people who listened to music for an hour every day for a week reported improved physical and psychological symptoms compared to the control group.

The participants, who had an average age of 50, were recruited from pain and chiropractic clinics in Ohio, USA. They had been suffering from a range of painful conditions, including osteoarthritis, disc problems and rheumatoid arthritis, for an average of six and a half years.

90 per cent said the pain affected more than one part of their body and 95 per cent said it was continuous. Before the music study, participants reported that their usual pain averaged just under six on a zero to ten pain scale and their worst pain exceeded nine out of ten.
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Could the key to weight loss for some people be as simple as getting some extra shuteye?

Possibly. New research suggests that people who don’t get enough sleep tend to weigh more — and that sleep can affect levels of the appetite-regulating hormones leptin and ghrelin.

“There is a dynamic balance between proper sleep and proper health. Sleep deprivation affects weight and a lot of other things. If you cheat sleep, there are a number of consequences, including affecting your hormones, appetite and mood,” said Dr. Patrick Strollo, medical director of the University of Pittsburgh Medical Center’s Sleep Medicine Center.

Two out of three Americans are overweight, and almost one in five are obese, according to the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. And, while most people are aware of the relationship of diet and exercise to excess weight, few realize that the amount of sleep they get each night can also affect their weight.

Researchers at the Sleep Disorders Center at Sentara Norfolk General Hospital in Virginia conducted two studies, each included 1,000 men and women, and they found that those who reported sleeping less tended to weigh more.

Of course, it could be that being overweight might make it harder to get a restful night sleep.

“People who are overweight may have less restful sleep due to heartburn, snoring or more serious sleep disorders like sleep apnea or night eating syndrome,” said Dr. Michelle May, author of “Am I Hungry? What To Do When Diets Don’t Work.”

But, she said, “It works both ways,” and that a lack of sleep can affect your weight. Sleep deprivation affects your body chemistry, appetite and the choices that you make throughout the day, May said.

Another recent study included 12 healthy men in their 20s. Each of the men slept only four hours for two nights. The study found that levels of leptin, a hormone that tells the brain it’s time to stop eating because the stomach is full, decreased by 18 percent during the two-day study period. Levels of another hormone, ghrelin, which turns the hunger mechanism on, increased by 28 percent.

On average, the men reported that their hunger pangs increased by 24 percent.

“Hormones change with sleep loss and deprivation,” said Strollo. “Sleep deprivation can affect appetite and also the type of food that one desires. When you’re sleep-deprived, you generally don’t crave carrot sticks.”

May agreed, adding, “When you’re tired, you’re less resilient to stress and other common emotional triggers for eating. When you eat to help you cope with emotions, you’re more likely to choose comfort foods like chocolate, ice cream or chips. And, since eating only helps temporarily, you may find yourself reaching for food again and again to try to make yourself feel better.

“Getting enough sleep is the best way to prevent sleep deprivation from contributing to weight gain,” May advised. “When you aren’t able to get your Zzzs, pay more attention to how much you eat and how you handle fatigue and stress. A short walk will be a better energy boost than a trip to the candy machine.”

Strollo said that while most people need between seven and eight hours of sleep a night, there are some people who need as many as 10 and others who may do well on just five hours.

The best way to figure out how much sleep you need, he said, is to take a long vacation and after a couple of days of catching up on your sleep debt, see how many hours of sleep you need to wake without an alarm clock. Since many Americans don’t take long vacations, if you feel that you’re not fully functional all day, or that you’re doing things to stay awake, like a double-espresso shot, you’re probably not getting enough sleep, he said.

May added that it’s important to remember that “healthy eating, physical activity and sleep are not luxuries, they are necessities.”

National Sleep Foundation 

Check out this video: ChinoTV Mix up Mawning

“What does money like? Money likes speed.
That’s the secret few know about money.
Money comes to those who act fast. If you think,
wonder, question, doubt, plan, meet, discuss, or in any other
way drag your feet, money goes to the next person in line.”
— Joe Vitale: A motivational author and coach